Tuesday, February 10, 2009

First Date

I got this in an E-mail from my friend, Ron a few weeks back.

First Date-------------

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had.

The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , Utah .

It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte.

They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!

Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while.

Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started.

In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.

Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation.

As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.

Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about 'what is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance!

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing.

She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.

Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free.

So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down.'

And you thought your first date was embarrassing.

Jay Leno's comment:
'This gives a whole new meaning
to being pissed off.'

Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.


Melody said...

How awful! But how FUNNY!

Jenny and the Princess Peonies said...

Oh MY Heck! I would have been mortified. Too funny!

Rachael said...

I love that story!

April said...

I remember hearing about this...can you imagine??? Desperate times call for desperate measures! So funny!

Sandy Toes said...

Oh..my goodness..that is so VERY FUNNY! -sandy toe

Heather said...

What a great story to be able to tell future generations!

Much better than mine, which is I met my husband in a bar.

Maybe I should get more creative...

Betty said...

LOL! That is hilarious! I had not heard about that one.

Lori said...

That is to funny! I could not imagine that, but what a story they have to tell.

Ashley said...

Oh, my! This is terrible! But hilarious! I'm glad they ended up getting married... though I still can't imagine my husband 'pissing me off' a car. Ugh! Haha!

Jill said...

I actually saw that episode of Leno! I cried from laughing so hard! :)

Susie said...

That's hilarious!! I knew they would get married! Only love at first site would do that for someone on a first date:-)

natalie said...

HAHA! This might possibly beat my most embarrassing story!!

Aubrey said...

THAT was definitely a first date to remember or NEVER forget!
Too funny!!

Kaye said...

Oh, now, that is funny! My husband and I dated for nearly a year before I ever went to the bathroom when out on a date with him. When I finally did say that I had to go to the restroom he breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Thank goodness! I thought there was something wrong with you!" You KNOW I would have died in that poor girl's situation! LOL!

WheresMyAngels said...

My worst first date was when I was 18 and a 6'8" basketball player took me to an Outdoor Roy Orbinson concert in KC. Everyone was staring at me and I thought it was because I was looking good. But no, my shirt was undone and my bright red bra showing. He never asked me out again. Course I think that was because I had to be home by 11pm. I lived an hour away from KC.

DysFUNctional Mom said...

I love it! I was so hoping they'd end up married, too.

heathersister said...

LMAO. I love it. I was on the road with a friend once, not a date, first or otherwise, and had to go. I was hiding beside the car, and each time I dropped my pants, he would inch the car forward. He thought it was quite funny. Me, not so much at the time but now it is.

Becky said...

That is the funniest thing I have ever heard!!! Oh my Gosh!!! How stinkin embarrassing! I think I would have been so mortified I would have torn the skin off my ass and acted like nothing was wrong. I don't know.

That is so cute that they are married! I don't think I would let Mike pee on me unless it was to save my life..IDK!